I AM Grateful

I am sitting here alone. Again. Jeff's late night schedule is really starting to get to me. I did laundry, made dinner, cleaned up after dinner, made my grocery list, made brownies, watched Property Virgins and Mystery Diagnosis. I went over the loan papers for the house, I looked on Ikea, Bassett Furniture, La-Z-Boy and Rc Willey websites, texted Jeff and told him to hurry home and got brownie and frosting on my PJ bottoms. I am so bored. I have a lot to be grateful for, and after a day like today I need to remind myself.

• I am grateful that Jeff and I have jobs. He has been at his for 9 years and I have been at mine for 13. I don't know very many people that can say that. (It also helped our loan process)
• I am grateful for a dishwasher. My kitchen is so small and any time I use even one pan the whole place feels crowded. Thank goodness for a dishwasher (which is churning away behind me).
• I am grateful for my eyesight. Last night as I was drifting off to sleep Jeff was telling me a story. All of the sudden, it felt like someone scratched my eye! We spent about a half an hour in the bathroom with me crying and Jeff looking at my eye and seeing nothing. I finally drifted off to sleep and woke up this morning just fine.
• Clothes. I am so thankful that I have clothes. Even though I have gained 50 pounds since we got married, I do have a few clothes that fit. I wear the same 5 things, but that is better than overflowing in the wrong clothes.
• Modern medicine. I take so much medication now, but I know it is helping. I can feel it working its sweet magic. I feel normal again. I even lost 6 pounds. I'll take it!
• The temple. Last weekend I was so frustrated with my health and we were so worried about the sellers accepting our offer. We decided to go to the temple and do sealings. The last time I did sealings was when we had mom sealed to her parents. Jeff had never done them. It was such a neat experience. I have never felt the presence of spirits on the other side so strongly. There was such an excitement in the room. It just felt like every couple that was sealed just had to give me a squeeze.
• MY bed! I love my mattress. When we got married we used Jeff's at first. I could not sleep on it, it was way too soft. I finally convinced him to switch. He did. I sleep so well now. I love my mattress. He even admits that the firm mattress helps him sleep, too.
• A good hair cut and color. Last night was Haircut Day. I color my hair every 3 months. Last night was so much fun getting a fresh color. It makes me feel like a beautiful woman again.
• Water. I love ice cold water. As Matt, Heather, Devin and I used to always say, "Water is good, water is wise."
• Children. I am so thankful for children. They say the funniest things and remind me of how wonderful and loving our Father in Heaven must be. Last week, the Matt Donbrosky family called me to wish me a Happy Birthday. They sang and I thanked them. Lauryn said, "You're welcome" and then passed the phone to Devin. We talked for a few minutes and then he passed the phone to Brenan. Heather said he was just grinning from ear to ear to be talking on the phone. I said, "Hi, Brenan" and he started squealing! I loved it. I still got it. My heart aches for the day I can be a mom. Hopefully, things will start to happen soon. Patience and Faith for now.
• Jeff. My best friend. I went to lunch with a dear friend yesterday and she mentioned how much she liked Jeff. He is thoughtful and genuinely cares about people. I got a good one. I waited forever for him. I went through so many heartbreaks to find him. The amazing thing is that none of those heartbreaks mean anything anymore. I know I went through a lot of pain, but I can't recall that pain like I used to. Last night, when he was trying to figure out what was in my eye, I knew that he would do ANYTHING for me. He always puts me first. I love him. He is the best. I love thinking about our future and filling our house with memories. He is the eternal optimist. When I am down or lacking a little faith, he just reminds me of what we have been promised. He always says, "We pay our tithing and we are trying our best. We are blessed."